PersonalGrowth & SelfEsteem

At times, do you feel low and down or disappointed?

Here is a quick and effective way to uplift you and feel good…always.

Take a sheet of paper and draw 3 columns.

At the left column, draw an eye, a ear, a nose, a hand and a tongue.

At the second column write “Good” as the header. At the last column, write ‘Bad” as the header.

Imagine that you are at home, then at each picture, write down those things or events that make you feel good ( and bad).

For example, for the ‘eye’ row, I list down fish, flower and spongebox as ‘good’ and tv as ‘bad’ .

Anytime I feel low, I look at this checklist to re-charge myself.

In other words, I enjoy looking at my 9 gold fishes or the fresh flowers  or my spongebox squarepants picture.

Then do another checklist for ‘at work’ and see if you become more motivated to work.

Why it works:

We are engaging our senses and depending on your own preferences, some of you will have more to write under the ear or hand etc.

We are actually triggered by our senses or submodalities and writing them down as check list serves to reinforce them.

Be sure to focus on the good column, not the bad column.

Whenever you get stuck or cannot progress in whatever you do, ask yourself this question…are you afraid of success or failure?

The answer is…you are afraid of success.
Hmm,  did I write correctly?
You bet.

Most of us are actually afraid of the unknown or the unfamiliarity.
We start to run the internal dialogue of…”what if  this  go wrong or I  never  do  it before or I do not know how to do it.”

Well these are the knowns, right?
Do you follow me?
For example, if you say..” I do not know how to do it”, you are saying that you know that you do not know how to do it.

What if you twist some words and change to ‘I do not know how to do it but I will just do it anyway’?

It means that you are going into the unknown, right?
Somehow as we grow older, we get more foolish or irrational.
When you are a young boy or girl, do you give a hoot about ” I don’t know how to do it?” or do you..” just do it”.
In fact, I am sure you have lots of fun in discovering the unknowns.

So the next time you get stuck, you are actually fearing success, not failure.
The  remedy?

“JUST DO IT!”

The next time you feel that your confidence or self esteem is low, say to yourself ‘cancel,cancel’ and if no one is looking put your two fingers together to make a cancel sign.

Somehow, this magic word will go straight to your sub-conscious mind and will cause you to change your state immediately.

Have an outstanding day!

If the law of attraction or other words below are familiar to you, then you will love Denise Coates.
…Law of attraction, the secret movie, think and grow rich, abraham/esther hicks, bob proctor.
Denise’s book “Feel It Real” contain many techniques that make your visualization skill to be as realistic and as easy as possible.I bought the book in Mar 2007 and it has become a constant companion.
For example, in game #15, the topic is ‘match the frequency’.
Here, the tip is to think of someone that that already possess the thing that you desire.
So for me, Donald Trump is my model  to  becoming rich.
Think about him, his behaviour, mannerism etc.
You are now tuned in to a radio station that match his wealth.
The radio is” fm101.wealthabundanceprosperity”
Stay tuned for a minute.Then record what you have felt.
This powerful exercise is for retraining your vibration toward already having your desires.

For more tips from Denise and her newly released interactive game, visit
==> http://hyperlink.to/denisecoates

Once in awhile we need a quick-fix solution.

Here are a couple of effective anti-dote from Anthony Robbins if you are feeling stuck.

1.0 If you are feeling too much work - Close your eyes.Then visualize your work to be a small image, getting smaller and smaller and darker.
How is it now.Do you feel more in control?

2.0 If you have an internal dialog that keeps bugging you-Close your eyes. Imagine a radio and use you hand to turn down the volume to very very low.
How does it feel now?

3.0 If you have a limiting belief ( eg I don’t know how to write articles or I feel overwhelmed) - Say it again but this time say it in the most sexy tone that you have.
If you can’t say out loud, just visualize it in your head.
I am sure you will feel different now, right?

Whenever you are not in control, take that feeling of fear or discomfort and make it small. Or beak the pattern with jokes or something ridiculous.
That is the technique used above, as taught by Anthony Robbins.

Grab his book at Amazon.

Have you experience being in a negative state and at that moment you felt that you want to raise your vibration or energy level but without success?
The trick is to focus on the transition or neutral stage before you attempt to think positive.
Very much like when you are driving your car in the reverse. When you want to move forward,it cannot be instant.There is a moment where you are not moving forward or backwards…or when you are in the neutral gear.
Once you are in the state of neutral,switching to being positive is much easier to achieve.
Here are some tips to put you in neutral gear easily:
Get fresh flowers.Put them in your bathtub or just put them in a jar and place them on your table.
Or you can try to meditate and instead of using a candle to assist in focusing, you can use your favorite flower.
Yet another way is  just to  do some flower arrangement.

Do try to get fresh flowers as the smell do play a part.And get wholesale flowers so that you get a good price for the freshest flowers possible.

P/s: If you are married, be sure to give flowers to your wife every year without fail for at least one occasion.Does wonder.

One of the best way to alter our emotions instantly is to listen to uplifting songs.
But what if you are swimming or surfing?
Get wet no more…introducing the world’s first waterproof,underwater MP3 player.

Michael Schmitz, a 6 times surfing champion uses it.
The good news is that my good friend, Reuben is marketing it .

If you are in Singapore, just mention my name to Reuben so that you get a special price.
Take a look at the amazing mp3 player now==> http://hyperlink.to/UnderwaterMP3Player

Here is a tip to re-charge you after a hard day’s work.
In your shower or bathtub, put on your waterproof mp3 player as you soak in the water.
Let the water wash away your negative vibes or events that happen earlier in the day.Time to say goodbye to unproductive events and move on to a new day.
Here is a video on a ‘time to say goodbye’ song by Andrea Bocelli and Sarah Brightman.

According to Dr Mel Gill, one in four people in the world suffer some form of mental illness.
If you do a google seach on  ‘depression’,  you will discover that this topic is highly sought after.
That is why emotional mastery is a skill that one must master.If it is only one thing that you need to learn in this physical world, it it to do yourself a big favor and invest your time and money in emotional mastery.
If not for you, at least for your children.Like it or not, they picked up habits of parents. And often when they pick up the habits, their subconscious mind do not differentiate the good or the bad.The habits get sucked up like a vacuum cleaner into their minds.

Anyway, if you have friends  that are suffering heavily on depression or showing signs of depression, please help them by sending this site to them=> addiction treatment.
There are other treatment available..like eating disorder and alcohol too.

Don’t know how to convey the message to them?
Here is a great tip…ask another friend to send an sms  on the url to the other friend that is suffering from depression.
They must not know each other so that the caller id is not seen on the phone.
Use a catchy phrase like ‘from a secret friend’…

Do post your results or any suggestions here to help others overcome their emotional challenges in life.

Yesterday, I watched another episode on “Search for the next pussy cat doll”. Two of the contestants were chosen to lead a team each.
You can watch the expression on the faces of the two of them… fear, horror, discomfort, disbelief on being chosen to be a leader.
They were intentionally chosen to lead because they have great potential in other skills but lack leadership skills. The only way for them to learn or overcome their limiting belief is to face it and step up.
At the end of the show, both contestants are still in the race and were happy that they were chosen to lead.
What a difference they have made, when compared to the beginning of the show.

Now, back to you…are there situations that is holding you back?
Or you feel the fear or the lack of confidence?
If the pussycat doll contestants can do it, I am sure you can too.
Time for you to step up.

Here are more power phrases to help you…

- Learn to feel comfortable by being uncomfortable.
- Rich people act in spite of fear;poor people let fear stop them ( T Harv Eker).
-”Impossible” is actually I m possible.
-Feel the fear and just do it ( Helen Keller)
-You don’t have to get it right, you just have to get it going.

And here is an exercise to help you get started…
Think of a situation in the past in which you feel very confident or certain.
With the feeling good, then take action now on something that is holding you back.

Or watch another video from the pussycat dolls to help you anchor ‘to do it now!’.
The song is ‘ wait a minute’. Do change it to ‘DON’T wait a minute…just do it”.

Yesterday, while watching TV, I saw a newsflash which showed 17 dragon boat rowers injured,5 drowned and feared dead. They were taking part in an annual dragon boat event in Cambodia in which more than 1 million people are expected to attend the 3-day event to celebrate Cambodia’s Water Festival.
It happened as they had finished the race and is about to dock to the side of the river to disembarked.

What is the first question that comes to your mind?
To me, it is obvious…why no life-jackets?

And this morning, the picture got clearer.
-The race is held to honour the ancient naval warriors of the country and to reflect the tradition, no jackets were worned.
- As they are about to dock, a sudden wave hit their boat and it hit into a pontoon, sucking all the rowers undeneath 9 metres of water.
-Fatigue and strong currents had an effect on them.

The life lessons here serve to remind me to never jump to conclusions.
How often do we jump to conclusions in life?
-like when our children do not do well in exams.
-or when we have an argument with our partner or spouse?
-or when our boss is not seeing our good work done.

It saddens me even deeper, knowing that the rowers are from my country, Singapore.
The five still missing are Stephen Loh, a national rower, Jeremy Goh,former vice captain of Nanyang Polytechnic dragon boat team, Poh Boon San, an engineer from Nanyang Tech University, Reuben Kee, Mr Singapore 2006 and Chee Wei Cheng, older of two sons.

200 people are involved in the search although the situation looks grim.
It is truly unfortunate that they chose to row back on their own instead of waiting to be towed back to the starting line after finishing the race.

Next time you jump to conclusions, take a deep breath and recall this unforgettable incident to remind you that it may not be what you are thinking.

P/s: Some 40 hours after the tragedy, all 5 bodies were recovered from the river. My deepest condolences to the families of the 5 rowers.